It was early morning of Sunday April 27 when I attended this year`s theme of Brothers Conference "
A knight`s
Tale"
I attended the conference with
a heavy heart learning about my mom`s condition is something I really did not expect to come.
Despite that, I still followed God and I still believe and trust him that he will take care of my mom.
I also believe that by entrusting to God everything, he will assure me of her physical healing.
And I am claiming it to God.
I still came early before the Mass at 7.30 and I was welcomed by our former FTW Benedict and Lawrence (from GMA conference in Cambodia) I am actually so glad and happy that I was able to attend this conference. I firmly believe that God sent me here with a purpose. I have no representation from any sectors, I contented myself seated on a chair belonging to the south sector. There are about 500 – 600 attendees and so empowering with the numbers of brothers worshiping, raising their hands, shouting and exalting to God. It was such a gesture of God`s chosen army. However, it was assessed that its only 20 to 30 percent only of the Sisters attending the Sisters conference. "She`s all That" Princess diaries. Thus, it leads to a very fruitful discussion on Brothers Issues of commitment, leadership, and brotherhood.
With the theme A knight`s Tale with the tagalog slogan attached to it KAKASA ka BA? The whole concept has led me to reflect on the current situation of our brothers in our community. But I would like to share my own reflection, and what have I got from the three sessions.
Honestly, I still feel like I am different from other brothers, I felt some insecurities from the way I handle myself or my personality as a whole. I also did expect that I will struggle to get attracted to people I will be meeting with, and I know it would be harder to resist when I get there. However, during the start of the conference, I felt that I was belonged. God is telling me that JR, you are here because you are a brother. God has molded you to be one of them. Whoever you see or you talk with, he is your brother and they also feel the same to you. They will also feel the brotherly love in you. When I heard the exultation about being ASTIG, it inspired me and told myself that I can also call myself ASTIG. Astig in committed to God, Astig if I am crying in worship, Astig to the Covenant and Astig to admit mistakes and turning to God for forgiveness.
In the conference, God manifested in all teachings. I was blessed, inspired, and totally challenged on the outcome of the teachings.
Every time I listen to the teachings, I sometimes feel that I can also relate to boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. It was so interesting! All the facts about the views of the sisters and what the brothers should do to the sisters. It was very inspiring till I thought of what if I get to a relationship and I could be a better brother for the sisters. Imagining it or not, maybe it could be a possibility.
I am not getting any younger and there`s a future ahead of me and I`ve been asking God, what is your plan for me? Am I too late for priesthood? Do I wish to stay old and remain single but serving you? Or I should get married? Am I just want to prove something? Get a girlfriend to prove to everyone that I am a man? Would that be so unfair to the girl? But in my prayers brothers and sisters, I am certain on my intention that I ask God to change totally all the wrong desires of my heart, transform me fully and if I was meant to be with someone, please bless me with a girl who will accept my past and would be ready to embrace everything within me. Will it or not Lord, I will praise you Lord for I am totally yours forever. But then, I also asked the Lord, that if I will love a girl, It`s a sincere kind of love, a love that I truly feel that this girl is the right one and the one that is really destined for me. So help me God!!!
At the end brothers and sisters, I became a knight! A knight that was designed to fight all battles, battle against pride, humbly enough to admit that I sinned and turned to God. A knight like a brother who committed himself to the goal of defeating the enemy. Not afraid to tell the truth even till death.
Finally, God has reigned and God told us in the conference that when we go out from this stadium, the battle is still yet to conquer and when we go back to our respective areas, we were assured of protection, we were assured of his promise, that we will conquer our fears and win the battle which the battle is only for the Lord. No matter how small the numbers of brothers in the community. Every brother will stood up and will possess God`s grace of a true leader, preparing him to be the Bossy, the Ideal brother of the sisters and the husband of his wife and the Father of his children.
Praise and Glory to the Lord!
Sir JR Abad
SFC Thailand