My Brothers and Sisters in SFC,
I just want to share some part of the letter that I wrote to a friend. Prior to that, he asked me why I`m still working in a place where Catholicism is forbidden, people are very rude, climate is extremely hot and you cannot enjoy all the goodness of life. Well…… I just replied -
If you`re asking me about my life here, boring! Whahahaha! It`s the same thing! I`m doing the same routine every day, mingling with the same people every hour, performing the same work every minute and having the same life every second. A boring life! But what keeps me going?
Well, I have 10 reasons why:
10. Career growth (a very good start) -
This will be a very good start for me. Working in a good company and having a very good position definitely I am able to improve my skills and develop my craft. But still looking for greener pastures perhaps in another country or company, (still open for greater opportunities in life) and this will be a good pattern to follow, right?
9. Personal growth (made me a responsible person today)
It prepares my emotional and mental well being. It has changed my perceptions about building my own family in the future. Before, I was scared of commitments, but now I`m ready for it. I know I can be a good provider, husband and father to my own family. (Nice may ganun!)
8. Maturity (helps me to become independent)
Almost same reason as No. 9. Changes are inevitable. I know I`m not a kid anymore who`s always under my mother`s skirt. Although it was so hard to live alone at first (knowing that I`m a very much attached to my family), but it taught me to stand and live alone and presently, I’m able to face the whole world by myself. I felt that I`ve accomplished so much. Being mature is not a matter of age or a matter of physical development but rather it is about achieving the utmost emotional stability of a person. And I considered myself emotionally stable but I haven`t yet achieved the height of it. I know I have so many things to learn with my journey in life and I`m just halfway through it, but I`m getting there…….. soon.(Nyakkkk...Hopefully, teka masarap pa rin maglaro ng taguan at piko eh, whahahaha!!)
7. Money (providing a good future for my siblings)
It`s an overwhelming feeling that you are able to help your siblings in their studies. Helping them to achieve their goals in life makes me happy and fulfilled. I know at some point, I`ve been part of their lives and I just wish that my hardship here will be their motivation to strive hard in their own lives as well. Hopefully they will be successful in their chosen fields.
6. Respect (I`ve gained my family`s respect)
Before, my younger siblings often called me by my name only (as in Edwin lang). My father asked them to call me kuya (older brother) but they refused to follow. And whenever they call me "Edwin" only , it always makes me mad. But it is true that respect is something that we have to gain and work for. It is not something we have to impose. And right now, I`m so glad that they`d call me "Kuya Edwin" when I call them on the phone not because I`m imposing it but they genuinely feel it. I felt that I`ve gained their respect without asking them to do so.
5. Love (loving unselfishly is a great feeling).
The thoughts and ideas of loving someone and being loved in return are the things that we know about the nature of love. However loving a person without any compensation, without corresponding price and loving unselfishly are the ways we can genuinely feel the true meaning of love. A feeling of fulfillment and immeasurable happiness are the two important benefits of unselfish love. Even though we receive the opposite of our expectations at least we feel that we have shared our pure and genuine love with others. (Never expect that they`ll give you back all the things you have given, because if we are expecting something in return from a person, certainly we will feel the bitterness of love, betrayal and anger, so be happy in sharing your love with others without conditions!)
4. A bright future (foreseeing a good life ahead)
Having a very good and comfortable life (financial aspect) is everyone`s dream. I hope that all of my sacrifices will bear fruit. I`m starting to save now, and hope I can build a business that can support my family in the Philippines (I`m in the planning and conceptualizing stage as of the moment, any idea my friends?). I know being an OFW is neither a permanent thing nor an assurance of uplifting my financial status but I hope it can be a source of capital needed to build my own business. If ever my business will be successful, definitely I will settle down for good in the Philippines. Masarap pa rin sa atin kahit ano pang sabihin ng iba.
3. Self esteem (boosting my self confidence more and more ) -
Before, I had little self esteem. I know that not all of my friends know about it because before some of them found me snobbish, mayabang. Well to be honest, it is one of my defense mechanisms. Portraying a very good image is just a façade. To be honest, inside I used to have so many insecurities in life. But now, I was able to gain my self esteem once more, I was able to triumphantly win my own battle (insecurities) and I’m boosting my self confidence more and more. Nice!!! (Naku lalo na `ata akong yumabang! Joke joke lang! Down-to-earth pa rin ako!!)
2. MY FAMILY ( I realize that they are the most precious gift from God. Now, I can see and appreciate their worth.)
Not every one of us has been given a chance to have a very loving and a good family like mine. Before, I considered myself to be the black sheep of the family, causing so many heartaches and emotional pains not only to my parents but to my siblings as well (in the past). But now, I realized all of their worth. Sometimes you should feel empty and alone to realize all the values and worth of the people around you. And good thing, it was not too late for me. Now, I try to give them back all the love and care that they deserve. I know my whole life is not enough, but I`m starting to share some part of my life with them. They are my strength and my motivation in life.
1. God (it brought me closer to God, too ironic, isn`t it?)
Ironic isn`t it? A country where Catholicism is forbidden, religious activities are equal to deportation, Bible study is equivalent to imprisonment, yet it made me closer to God. But it is the reality; joining SFC made my shaky and shallow beliefs become stronger and intact with God again. An every night Bible reading helped me to understand the word of God. An everyday prayer time created a close communication with God. And a once a week Household made me realize that I have so many things to be thankful for and so many great things to be joyful about. I hope I can live with it, follow God`s path and be able to share it to others.
Before, I was avoiding God every single day of my life. I felt that I can`t enjoy my life because for me, following His path meant a very hard and lifeless journey. But God kept on approaching me; He made so many ways for me to embrace Him again. Now, for me following God`s path is a very joyful and wonderful voyage. God gives me all the strength that I need when I`m weak. God amuses me when I`m sad and depressed. God never leaves me when I`m alone and helpless.
God is really working on me everyday .God give me reason why I should continue life with happiness and joy. I`m now living my life with a purpose, a purpose that drives me to go on in my life with Jesus and that purpose is to be with Him in heaven for eternity.
If somebody will ask me again what is my ultimate reason why I`m here, I will gladly and confidently say that GOD is my ultimate reason why I`m still here in Saudi Arabia and my purpose why I`m living, He is my LIFE.
(Sometime we have to enumerate everything, and analyze it well before we appreciate our existence here on earth. We should look at the positive side of life. If most of the time, life seems so lifeless, full of sorrows and pains, then we should list down all the good things that we`ve experienced and make it our motivation in life. There is a saying, "Don`t cry over spilled milk." Therefore if we experience some downfall then stand up and move forward. Don`t think of what you`ve lost but rather think of what`s left with you and what you`ve learned from bad experiences. Be positive my friend! )
To God be the Glory,
Bro. Edwin Austria ( Riyadh Chapter)